Not just a one day event, I'm blogging every day about what I'm thankful for

Not done yet, I guess

I thought writing about my classmate dying and how she bullied me yesterday would help. I think it did, but I’m not done yet. 

I feel so guilty today about comments I made yesterday to friends. Ellen hasn’t impacted me in nearly 50 years so why can’t I let it go? 

I remember going home from school and telling my mom what was happening. Her response? She taught me that “sticks and stones can break my bones, but words can never hurt me.” Boy, was she wrong. It is much easier to recover from sticks and stones and almost impossible to recover from hurtful words. I also remember that I quit telling my mom what was happening. I just turned it all inward, assuming that it was me and no one else. 

I hope we are teaching our children differently today. Bullying is real and always has been. It shouldn’t be swept under the rug. It also isn’t the person being bullied’s (or taunted or whatever) fault. 

Kindness, my friends. We need more kindness. 

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Comments on: "Not done yet, I guess" (4)

  1. This is my Quip for Tuesday: “Words touch and by touching leave an indelible mark. So choose your words carefully.” I wrote it years ago in answer to an old memory about being bullied.

  2. Some things are hard to let go. It sounds like Ellen had a bigger impact than you originally thought. Maybe writing about it helps. Let’s hope so.

  3. So, so true. Words can be deadly. Just see what is happening with bullying through social media. No sticks and stones are involved, just words. I’m sorry that your mom wasn’t more sympathetic and understanding. My mom would have been the same. Actually, she was a bit of a bully herself way back then. But we all have that child in us, that child that never seems to grow up. Sometimes the child is the cause of all our wonderful creativity, but that child can also be the source of great pain and sorrow. We just don’t forget how vulnerable we were back then. I hope writing helps and talking but give yourself time. Those feelings of fear have lain dormant for 50 years. It’s not that you didn’t get over them; it’s that you haven’t had to acknowledge them for so long.

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